Foreigners still caught in Sahara hostage crisis


ALGIERS (Reuters) - More than 20 foreigners were still being held hostage or missing inside a gas plant on Friday after Algerian forces stormed the desert complex to free hundreds of captives taken by Islamist militants, who threatened to attack other energy installations.


Thirty hostages, including at least seven Westerners, were killed during Thursday's assault, along with at least 18 of their captors, said an Algerian security source.


The attack, which plunged capitals around the world into crisis mode, is a serious escalation of unrest in northwestern Africa, where French forces have been in Mali since last week fighting an Islamist takeover of Timbuktu and other towns.


"We are still dealing with a fluid and dangerous situation where a part of the terrorist threat has been eliminated in one part of the site, but there still remains a threat in another part," British Prime Minister David Cameron told his parliament.


A local Algerian source said 100 of 132 foreign hostages had been freed from the facility. The fate of the other 32 was unclear as the situation was changing rapidly.


Earlier he said 60 were still missing with some believed still held hostage, but it was unclear how many, and how many might be in hiding elsewhere in the sprawling compound.


Two Japanese, two Britons and a French national were among the seven foreigners confirmed dead in the army's storming, the Algerian security source told Reuters. One British citizen was killed when the gunmen seized the hostages on Wednesday.


Those still unaccounted for on Friday included 10 from Japan and eight Norwegians, according to their employers, and a number of Britons which Cameron put at "significantly" less than 30.


France said it had no information on two Frenchmen who may have been at the site and Washington has said a number of Americans were among the hostages, without giving details. The local source said a U.S. aircraft landed nearby on Friday.


Some countries have been reluctant to give details of the numbers of their missing nationals to avoid disclosing information that may be useful to their captors.


As Western leaders clamored for news, several expressed anger they had not been consulted by the Algerian government about its decision to storm the facility.


The sprawling facility housed hundreds of workers. Algeria's state news agency said the army had rescued 650 hostages in total, 573 of whom were Algerians.


"(The army) is still trying to achieve a ‘peaceful outcome' before neutralizing the terrorist group that is holed up in the (facility) and freeing a group of hostages that is still being held," it said, quoting a security source.




MULTINATIONAL INSURGENCY


Algerian commanders said they moved in on Thursday about 30 hours after the siege began because the gunmen had demanded to be allowed to take their captives abroad.


An Irish engineer who survived said he saw four jeeps full of hostages blown up by Algerian troops.


A French hostage employed by a French catering company said Algerian military forces had found some British hostages hiding and were combing the sprawling In Amenas site for others when he was escorted away by the military.


"I hid in my room for nearly 40 hours, under the bed. I put boards up pretty much all round," Alexandre Berceaux told Europe 1 raid. "I didn't know how long I was going to stay there ... I was afraid. I could see myself already ending up in a pine box."


"When Algerian solders ... came for me, I didn't even know it was over. They were with some of my colleagues, otherwise I'd never have opened the door."


Western governments are trying to determine the degree to which the hostage taking was part of an international conspiracy and was linked, as the captors claimed, to the week-old French military intervention in neighboring Mali.


The Algerian security source said only two of 11 militants whose bodies were found on Thursday were Algerian, including the squad's leader. The others comprised three Egyptians, two Tunisians, two Libyans, a Malian and a Frenchman, he said.


Algeria state news agency APS said the group had planned to take the hostages to Mali.


The plant was heavily fortified, with security, controlled access and an army camp with hundreds of armed personnel between the accommodation and processing plant, Andy Coward Honeywell, who worked there in 2009, told the BBC.


U.S. Defense Secretary Leon Panetta said those responsible would be hunted down: "Terrorists should be on notice that they will find no sanctuary, no refuge, not in Algeria, not in North Africa, not anywhere," he said in London. "Those who would wantonly attack our country and our people will have no place to hide."


MALI WOES


The crisis posed a serious dilemma for former colonial power Paris and its allies as French troops attacked the hostage-takers' al Qaeda allies in Mali, another former colony.


The desert fighters have proved to be better trained and equipped than France had anticipated, diplomats told Reuters at the United Nations, which said 400,000 people could flee Mali to neighboring countries in the coming months.


In Algeria, the kidnappers warned locals to stay away from foreign companies' oil and gas installations, threatening more attacks, Mauritania's news agency ANI said, citing a spokesman for the group.


Algerian workers form the backbone of an oil and gas industry that has attracted international firms in recent years partly because of military-style security. The kidnapping, storming and further threat cast a deep shadow over its future.


Hundreds of workers from international oil companies were evacuated from Algeria on Thursday and many more will follow, BP, which jointly ran the gas plant with Norway's Statoil and the Algerian state oil firm, said on Friday.


The overall commander of the kidnappers, Algerian officials said, was Mokhtar Belmokhtar, a veteran of Afghanistan in the 1980s and Algeria's bloody civil war of the 1990s and one of a host of Saharan Islamists, flush with arms and fighters from the 2011 civil war in Libya. He appears not to have been present.


Algerian security specialist Anis Rahmani, author of several books on terrorism and editor of Ennahar daily, told Reuters about 70 militants were involved from two groups, Belmokhtar's "Those who sign in blood", who travelled from Libya, and the lesser known "Movement of the Islamic Youth in the South".


"They were carrying heavy weapons including rifles used by the Libyan army during (Muammar) Gadaffi's rule," he said. "They also had rocket-propelled grenades and machineguns."


Algeria's government is implacably at odds with Islamist guerrillas who remain at large in the south, years after the civil war through the 1990s in which some 200,000 people died.


Britain's Cameron, who warned people to prepare for bad news and who cancelled a major policy speech on Friday to deal with the situation, said he would have liked Algeria to have consulted before the raid. Japan made similar complaints.


U.S. officials had no clear information on the fate of Americans, though a U.S. military drone had flown over the area. Washington, like its European allies, has endorsed France's move to protect the Malian capital by mounting air strikes last week and now sending 1,400 ground troops to attack Islamist rebels.


The apparent ease with which the fighters swooped in from the dunes to take control of an important energy facility, which produces some 10 percent of the natural gas on which Algeria depends for its export income, has raised questions over the value of outwardly tough security measures.


(Additional reporting by Ali Abdelatti in Cairo, Eamonn Mallie in Belfast, Gwladys Fouche in Oslo, Mohammed Abbas in London and Padraic Halpin and Conor Humprhies in Dublin; Writing by Philippa Fletcher; Editing by Peter Graff)



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Morrisons to launch online kitchenware business






LONDON (Reuters) – Britain‘s fourth largest supermarket group Wm Morrison said on Friday it would extend its online presence in the spring with the launch of a kitchenware website in partnership with specialist Lakeland.


The joint venture will be Morrisons‘ third fully transactional website following the launch of wine website MorrisonsCellar.com in November and the purchase of baby care retailer Kiddicare.com in 2011.






“We believe the future for retailing many non-food products is online rather than in supermarkets,” said Chief Executive Dalton Philips.


Unlike the other grocers that make up Britain’s so called “big four” – market leader Tesco, Wal-Mart’s Asda and J Sainsbury – Morrisons does not have a website for the home delivery of food.


Earlier this month Morrisons posted a weak Christmas trading update that it partly attributed to its lack of an online food offer.


The firm is researching the possibility and plans to say more when it publishes full year results in March. Most analysts expect it to launch a trial this year.


(Reporting by James Davey; editing by Kate Holton)


Internet News Headlines – Yahoo! News





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Channing Tatum & Jenna Dewan-Tatum Share a Fresh, Healthy Lunch Date















01/18/2013 at 01:35 PM EST







Jenna Dewan-Tatum and Channing Tatum


FameFlynet


Eating for three?

Parents-to-be Jenna Dewan-Tatum and husband Channing, fresh from a beach holiday in St. Barts, enjoyed a casual lunch date together on Wednesday.

The couple, who wed in 2009 and announced their happy baby news in mid-December, shared their meal at Greenleaf Gourmet Chopshop in Beverly Hills.

Jenna, 32, went with healthy eating, dining on the restaurant's seasonal salad (kale, tangerine, dried blueberry, almonds and citrus vinagrette) while PEOPLE's Sexiest Man Alive, also 32 – and an Alabama native – chose more hearty Southern fare, specifically a barbecue chicken sandwich.

"They were a sweet couple and she's got a little bump too," said an onlooker.
– Jennifer Garcia


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Flu season 'bad one for the elderly,' CDC says


Flu hospitalizations among the elderly rose sharply last week, prompting federal officials to take unusual steps to make more flu medicines available and to urge wider use of them as soon as symptoms appear.


The U.S. is about halfway through the flu season, which is shaping up to be worse than average and a bad one for the elderly, said Dr. Thomas Frieden, director of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.


New figures from the CDC show the flu epidemic is continuing, with widespread activity in all states but Tennessee and Hawaii.


Nine more children or teens have died of the flu, bringing the nation's total this flu season to 29, health officials reported Friday. That's close to the 34 pediatric deaths reported during all of the last flu season, although that one was unusually light. In a typical season, about 100 children die of the flu and officials said there is no way to know whether deaths this season will be higher or lower than usual.


So far, half of confirmed flu cases are in people 65 and older. Lab-confirmed flu hospitalizations totaled 19 for every 100,000 in the population, but 82 per 100,000 among those 65 and older, "which is really quite a high rate," Frieden said.


"We expect to see both the number and the rates of both hospitalizations and deaths rise further in the next week or so as the flu epidemic progresses," so prompt treatment with antivirals is key to preventing deaths, he said.


Two drugs — Tamiflu and Relenza — can cut the severity and risk of death from the flu but must be started within 48 hours of first symptoms to do much good. To increase supplies of Tamiflu, said Dr. Margaret Hamburg, head of the Food and Drug Administration, said the agency had allowed Genentech to distribute additional doses that have old packaging information.


This year's season is earlier than normal and the dominant flu strain is one that tends to make people sicker.


Health officials say it's not too late to get a flu shot to help protect against the flu. Vaccinations are recommended for anyone 6 months or older.


Last week, the CDC said the flu again surpassed an "epidemic" threshold, based on monitoring of deaths from flu and a frequent complication, pneumonia. The flu epidemic happens every year and officials say this year's vaccine is a good match for strains that are going around.


The government doesn't keep a running tally of adult deaths from the flu, but estimates that it kills about 24,000 people most years.


___


Online:


CDC flu: http://www.cdc.gov/flu/index.htm


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Wall Street slips after disappointing Intel results

NEW YORK (Reuters) - Stocks edged lower on Friday from a five-year high for the S&P 500 as a weak outlook from tech heavyweight Intel offset a better-than-expected quarterly profit at Morgan Stanley.


But the S&P 500 was still on track to end higher for a third consecutive week.


Shares of Intel Corp slumped nearly 7 percent to $21.11 a day after it forecast quarterly revenue below analysts' estimates and announced plans for increased capital spending amid slow demand for personal computers.


"Intel earnings weren't that bad, although their revenue was weak. It sparks fears about not only the company but about the whole PC sector, and that's pressuring the market today," said Tim Ghriskey, chief investment officer of Solaris Group in Bedford Hills, New York.


The Intel results were offset somewhat by Morgan Stanley , which reported a fourth-quarter profit after a year-earlier loss, helped by higher revenue at the bank's institutional securities business. Its stock jumped 7.4 percent to $22.29.


Overall, S&P 500 fourth-quarter earnings rose an estimated 2.5 percent, according to Thomson Reuters data. Expectations for the quarter have dropped considerably since October, when a 9.9 percent gain was estimated.


The Dow Jones industrial average <.dji> was down 15.17 points, or 0.11 percent, at 13,580.85. The Standard & Poor's 500 Index <.spx> was down 3.51 points, or 0.24 percent, at 1,477.43. The Nasdaq Composite Index <.ixic> was down 13.98 points, or 0.45 percent, at 3,122.03.


On Thursday, the S&P 500 rose to its highest since late 2007, and that could prompt investors to lock in recent gains, analysts said.


Despite the day's decline, market sentiment was still positive on speculation that chances were better of avoiding a debt ceiling fight in Washington. House Republicans signaled on Thursday they might support a short-term extension of U.S. borrowing authority next month.


"The debt ceiling issue is sort of out of the news. The market has definitely become complacent. And we all know that the issue will be dealt with, we just need to find out when. If December is any guide, they are going to leave it up to the last minute so the market is definitely more complacent than it should be for now," Ghriskey said.


Reflecting the complacency, the CBOE Volatility index <.vix>, Wall Street's so-called fear gauge, fell 4.1 percent at just above 13. The VIX usually moves inversely to the S&P 500 as it is used as a hedge tool against further market decline.


Economic data from China provided some support to the market, though the focus remained on U.S. corporate earnings. The country's economy grew at a modestly faster-than-expected 7.9 percent in the fourth quarter, the latest sign the world's second-biggest economy was pulling out of a post-global financial crisis slowdown which saw it grow in 2012 at its weakest pace since 1999.


General Electric reported a better-than-expected rise in earnings, spurred by robust demand in China and oil-producing countries. Shares were up 2.9 percent to $21.92.


Despite the gains by Morgan Stanley, financial stocks sagged as Capital One Financial reported disappointing profit. Capital One slumped 7.7 percent to $56.87, while the KBW bank index <.bkx> slipped 0.9 percent.


Research In Motion climbed 6.6 percent to $15.91 after Jefferies Group boosted the BlackBerry maker's rating and price target.


(Editing by Bernadette Baum, Kenneth Barry and Nick Zieminski)



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Algerian forces launch operation to break desert siege


ALGIERS (Reuters) - Twenty-five foreign hostages escaped and six were killed on Thursday when Algerian forces launched an operation to free them at a remote desert gas plant, Algerian sources said, as one of the biggest international hostage crises in decades unfolded.


Fast-moving details of the military operation to free the hostages were difficult to confirm. Algeria's official APS news agency said that the military had freed four foreign hostages, giving no further information.


A local source told Reuters six foreign hostages were killed along with eight captors when the Algerian military fired on a vehicle being used by the gunmen. An Algerian security source said the 25 foreign hostages had escaped.


Mauritania's ANI news agency, which has been in constant contact with the kidnappers, said seven hostages were still being held: two Americans, three Belgians, one Japanese and one British citizen.


The standoff began when gunmen calling themselves the Battalion of Blood stormed the gas plant on Wednesday morning. They said they were holding 41 foreigners and demanded a halt to a French military operation against fellow al Qaeda-linked Islamist militants in neighboring Mali.


ANI and Qatar-based Al Jazeera reported that 34 of the captives and 15 of their captors had been killed when government forces fired from helicopters at a vehicle. Those death tolls, far higher than confirmed by the local source, would contradict the reports that large numbers of foreigners escaped alive.


Britain and Norway, whose oil firms BP and Statoil run the plant jointly with the Algerian state oil company, said they had been informed by the Algerian authorities that a military operation was under way but did not provide details.


As many as 180 Algerian hostages had also been held but managed to flee, the local source said.


The incident dramatically raises the stakes in the French military campaign in neighboring Mali, where hundreds of French paratroopers and marines are launching a ground offensive against rebels after air strikes began last week.


Algerian Interior Minister Daho Ould Kablia said the kidnappers were led by Mokhtar Belmokhtar, a veteran Islamist guerrilla who fought Soviet forces in Afghanistan in the 1980s and had set up his own group in the Sahara after falling out with other local al Qaeda leaders.


A holy warrior-cum-smuggler dubbed "The Uncatchable" by French intelligence and "Mister Marlboro" by some locals for his illicit cigarette-running business, Belmokhtar's links to those who seized towns across northern Mali last year are unclear.


The hostage takers earlier allowed some prisoners to speak to the media, apparently to put pressure on Algerian forces not to storm the compound. An unidentified hostage who spoke to France 24 television said prisoners were forced to wear explosive belts and captors had threatened to blow up the plant.


Two hostages, identified as British and Irish, spoke to Al Jazeera television and called on the Algerian army to withdraw from the area to avoid casualties.


"We are receiving care and good treatment from the kidnappers. The (Algerian) army did not withdraw and they are firing at the camp," the British man said. "There are around 150 Algerian hostages. We say to everybody that negotiations is a sign of strength and will spare many any loss of life."


NUMBERS UNCONFIRMED


The precise number and nationalities of foreign hostages could not be confirmed, with some countries reluctant to release information that could be useful to the captors.


Britain said one of its citizens was killed in the initial storming on Wednesday and "a number" of others were held.


The militants said seven Americans were among their hostages, a figure U.S. officials said they could not confirm.


Norwegian oil company Statoil said nine of its Norwegian staff and three Algerian employees were captive. Britain's BP, which operates the plant with Statoil and Algerian state oil company Sonatrach, said some of its staff were held but would not say how many or their nationalities.


Japanese media said five workers from Japanese engineering firm JGC Corp. were held, a number the company did not confirm. Paris has not said whether any hostages were French. Vienna said one hostage was Austrian, Dublin said one was Irish and Bucharest said an unspecified number were Romanian.


Spanish oil company Cepsa said it had begun to evacuate personnel from elsewhere in Algeria.


Paris said the Algeria attack demonstrated it was right to intervene in Mali: "We have the flagrant proof that this problem goes beyond just the north of Mali," French ambassador to Mali Christian Rouyer told France Inter radio.


President Francois Hollande has received public backing from Western and African allies who fear that al Qaeda, flush with men and arms from the defeated forces of Libya's Muammar Gaddafi, is building a desert haven in Mali, a poor country helpless to combat fighters who seized its north last year.


However, there is also some concern in Washington and other capitals that the French action in Mali could provoke a backlash worse than the initial threat by militants in the remote Sahara.


The militants, communicating through established contacts with media in neighboring Mauritania, said they had dozens of men armed with mortars and anti-aircraft missiles in the compound and had rigged it with explosives.


"We hold the Algerian government and the French government and the countries of the hostages fully responsible if our demands are not met, and it is up to them to stop the brutal aggression against our people in Mali," read one statement carried by Mauritanian media.


They condemned Algeria's secularist government for letting French warplanes fly over its territory to Mali and shutting its border to Malian refugees.


PRESSING ON


The attack in Algeria did not stop France from pressing on with its campaign in Mali. It said on Thursday it now had 1,400 troops on the ground in Mali, and combat was underway against the rebels that it first began targeting from the air last week.


"There was combat yesterday, on the ground and in the air. It happened overnight and is under way now," said Le Drian. Residents said a column of about 30 French Sagaie armored vehicles set off on Wednesday toward rebel positions from the town of Niono, 300 km (190 miles) from the capital, Bamako.


The French action last week came as a surprise but received widespread international support in public. Neighboring African countries planning to provide ground troops for a U.N. force by September have said they will move faster to deploy them.


Nigeria, the strongest regional power, sent 162 soldiers on Thursday, the first of an anticipated 906.


"The whole world clearly needs to unite and do much more than is presently being done to contain terrorism, with its very negative impact on global peace and security," President Goodluck Jonathan said.


Germany, Britain and the Netherlands have offered transport aircraft to help ferry in African troops. Washington has said it is considering what support it can offer.


Many inhabitants of northern Mali have welcomed the French action, though some also fear being caught in the cross-fire. The Mali rebels who seized Timbuktu and other oasis towns in northern Mali last year imposed Islamic law, including public amputations and beheadings that angered many locals.


A day after launching the campaign in Mali, Hollande also ordered a failed rescue in Somalia on Saturday to free a French hostage held by al Qaeda-linked al Shabaab militants since 2009. Al Shabaab said on Thursday it had executed hostage Denis Allex. France said it believed he died in the rescue.


(Reporting by Lamine Chikhi; Writing by Peter Graff; Editing by Giles Elgood)



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AT&T Offers $100 Off HSPA+ Nexus 7 for a Limited Time






The Nexus 7, made by Asus in partnership with Google, was the first really successful Android tablet that wasn’t made by a bookseller. It brought the hundreds of thousands of games and apps on Google Play (formerly the Android Market) to a wide audience, and it did so at an unheard-of price point: Only $ 199, for a device packing a Tegra 3 processor which made it much more powerful (and better for gaming) than Amazon‘s Kindle Fire.


When the Nexus 7 launched, it was Wi-Fi only and had as little as 8 GB of storage space. Google and Asus have fixed both of those problems, and from now until Feb. 14, AT&T is offering $ 100 worth of credit towards your wireless bill with the purchase of a new Nexus 7 and the signing of a two-year wireless contract.






The tablet itself


The Nexus 7 isn’t designed as a book-reader, but is more of a competitor to the iPad Mini. It lacks exclusive Amazon services like Amazon Instant Video, and many of the best iPad games and apps either aren’t available for it or aren’t available yet. It has far more games and apps for it than the Kindle, though, and can actually read Kindle books and run games and apps that you previously bought for the Kindle.


Its Tegra 3 processor allows it to play “THD”-enhanced games, which are roughly comparable in graphics quality to modern iPad or Xbox games. Finally, the model that AT&T is offering a discount on has both HSPA+ (a slower version of 4G) wireless Internet and 32 GB of storage, a combination which costs $ 559 on a similarly palm-sized iPad Mini. The Nexus 7 is only $ 299, and that’s before the $ 100 credit.


AT&T’s plans


The cheapest plan available is the $ 10 Mobile Share plan, which allows you to add the tablet to a plan that you already have. The next cheapest is AT&T’s $ 15 plan, which offers only 250 MB per month — okay for occasional email and web surfing, but completely inadequate for streaming videos regularly. Its $ 30 plan offers 3 GB of data, which still won’t stand up to constant Netflix viewing but will hold up much better than the $ 15 one.


What else is there?


The iPad and iPad Mini are also available (and much more expensive) from AT&T, as is a new Lenovo IdeaTab. It’s available for $ 199 off-contract and $ 99 on a two-year contract, but it’s not as fast or powerful as the Nexus 7, can’t play the same games, and has much less storage space.


Finally, if you like the Nexus 7 but aren’t sure you’ll still want it in two years (especially since the hardware is half a year old already), AT&T offers month-to-month wireless plans, which can be canceled at any time without paying an early termination fee. You just won’t get the $ 100 discount unless you sign a two-year contract.


Jared Spurbeck is an open-source software enthusiast, who uses an Android phone and an Ubuntu laptop PC. He has been writing about technology and electronics since 2008.


Wireless News Headlines – Yahoo! News





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Diem Brown Blogs: Getting Through the Ultimate Relationship Test

In her PEOPLE.com blog, Diem Brown, the Real World/Road Rules Challenge contestant recently diagnosed with ovarian cancer for the second time, opens up about her desire for a child and the ups and downs of cancer and fertility procedures.

I think illness is the ultimate relationship test. You can see so many colors and facets of how different sets of relationships deal with a hardship when going through an illness. I'll get to the romantic relationship later, but I think the same test is put on friendships, families and even your relationship with your job.

We all know the vow: "For better or for worse, in sickness and in health, 'til death does us part." I think the first time I heard that vow was watching my favorite TV couple Kelly Kapowski and Zack Morris get married in their Hawaii TV Special ... yep I was obsessed with Saved By the Bell!

My point is that we have heard this marriage vow since we were little kids, on every TV show, movie or at a family members wedding. We heard that vow as kids and instantly felt security knowing that in our future, we will state a vow that bonds two people through whatever hardship may come their way.

However outside of marriage, there are no vows that set guidelines of how relationships are supposed to play out during an illness.

At the friendship level relationship, I have been so lucky to have most of my friends step up and support me in ways that have touched my heart. Through letters, Facebook messages, texts, girls nights in and even visits to N.Y.C. I have felt a deep love and I will always be connected to my friends that have shown me they are there no matter how long this cancer process takes.

You reading this blog right now and those who have left sweet comments and tweets have also given me so much love and strength and I do not know how I can ever repay the support I have been given.

That's not to say I haven't had some friends who helped me through my first bout with ovarian cancer, but they now seem distant and aloof this time around. They are not bad people, but in my sensitive state of mind they have clearly shown and voiced that they've helped me before but this they are choosing to sit this time around out.

I have to be honest – that it hurts, but it also makes the friends that step up no matter how many times you are kicked down shine even brighter.

That Marilyn Monroe quote comes to mind: "If you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best."

Do You Owe Your Loyal Friends?

Quick sidenote: I've been asked, "How do you act when your friend gets cancer? Should/can you still vent to them about your problems?" To that I say ABSOLUTELY! They are the same best friend you had before, so vent away with what's going on in your life as it actually helps a patient to hear things other than hospital talk.

Just remember to also be an ear for your friend when they want to share or are ready to vent about their health fears.

For me, that's the relationship friend test – so when you are battling an illness it will become clear as day who is there for you. You might have friends that "fall off," but try to focus and let yourself be blown away by the love people that you never thought would care so much about you give. Those people are your gem friends and your gratitude towards them will never fade!

Now what about the romantic relationship test? This part is hard and I have some strong opinions about this. I have talked to so many girls about how they feel they "owe" something to the guy that stuck by their side during cancer.

I understand that feeling – you wanna repay every loyal person but you especially want to repay the man that stuck beside you as you entered your surgery room, helped lift you to your feet and picked up your hair as it fell out etc.

The first time I had cancer I felt this "debt" like no other. I actually tried to break up with my boyfriend at the time before I even started chemo for fear of a break-up during treatments would be too hard.

He ended up not listening to my rationale and when my hair fell out, he would say the things that the average guys doesn't realize makes the patient feel in debt. "I'm not leaving. Look I'm with you right now and you are bald," he would say with a sincere smile. Now, in his mind he was trying to show his commitment, but his comment sparked a heated fire within me.

I asked myself: "Wait what does he mean by 'and you are bald?; Does he want a medal? Is it so hard to be with a bald sick girl?" Needless to say, that was the start of my "internal resentment fire" towards him.

Yet, even when I broke up with him a month after I was done with treatment, I still felt this guilt that, yeah, he did stick by me through cancer ... I owed him for so much help he gave to me.

I've had relationships after my first time with cancer and had built a definite defense wall up. I guarded myself, scared to get too close to someone. Scared to feel I owed something to someone.

Assessing Your Baggage

Dating after my first round of cancer, I would also try and figure out ... when do you tell someone you are dating about your cancer past? "Nice meeting you and oh yeah by the way I had cancer and now have one ovary so not sure if I can have kids..." I would then start to rationalize with myself, "Wait, why do I even have to tell him ... What's the point? Is it really any of their business?"

I would then ponder, what if you were single and wanted to start dating while you are undergoing cancer treatments or start dating immediately after your last chemo treatments. You couldn't hide the physical signs that you are/were sick?

For example, let's say you signed-up for Match.com would you put up a bald picture as your profile pic or would you post an old picture of yourself before cancer or do something in the middle and have your profile picture be of you in your wig?

Most women I know want to be known for who they are, not for what "baggage" they may have. Personally, if in that situation, I think I would post a profile picture of myself in my wig BUT maybe have a bald pic in the "additional pictures" section, because having cancer isn't who you are, its just additional information, right?

I think most women with cancer, especially breast and ovarian cancer, feel ripped off regarding some part of what makes you feel feminine. It's hard not to let your head get all weird and over-analyze what other people will think.

But to be honest, from my experience ... guys don't care. They, for the most part, react in the same way as they react when you say, "I'm not a natural blonde." I'm exaggerating of course, but honestly most guys just don't over think the way most girls do. They just see the girl standing before them, guys hardly analyze the past "baggage" that got them there.

High Expectations

Currently during my second round with cancer ... I expected/expect a lot out of my boyfriend. It may not seem fair, but I do. I have learned from my past and although we have no "vows," I told him upfront when I got the news of my second bout with cancer what was going to happen.

I told him if he doesn't think he can handle what's about to come, it's better if we separate now and I would have no hard feelings.

I told him I'm going to become super emotional and moody and will likely take out most of my frustration out on him if he stays.

I told him there is no medal for staying with me through this or for helping me emotionally cope when my hair falls out or when I get overwhelmed with the whole cancer process.

He looked at me smirking and said, "I'm not going anywhere you crazy girl!"

Yes, he sounds great and all, but he is a guy and I swear they have zero clue on the impact of the words that come out of their mouths.They don't realize that most girls analyze everything, especially when we are feeling vulnerable.

I have gotten upset at him for certain things he has said that I felt were insensitive. I have also gotten upset at him for not touching and kissing my head, thinking inside that he must be grossed out by the "bald thing" in some way.

Be Honest, Be Vulnerable

However, now that I'm "older and wiser" instead of bottling that resentment up, I voice it and his reaction are hilarious. "I thought I wasn't allowed to ... I didn't think you would let me touch your head – you're always hiding it."

Given how insecure I was/am, I had envisioned this shining-armor boyfriend knight rising up, grabbing my bald head and kissing it all over, forcing me to get over my insecurities.

I had wanted all of this without saying I wanted him to do any of the above, I wanted him to just figure it out and do it. Brilliant I know ... I expected my boyfriend to be a mind reader.

I think we forget when going through a hard time just how important being vulnerably honest with the people you love is. Even if you don't have a vow with your friends or boyfriend, you can make your own set of vows by not holding anything back.

By stating your fears, you are taking away any thoughts of feeling indebted. By expressing yourself, you are not allowing an "internal resentment fire" to grow inside you. By allowing people who love you to be there for you, you are creating your own specific set of vows that will help you through your cancer/illness journey.

People who love you want to help you, but most just don't know how. So instead of getting frustrated that they aren't being the mind readers you want them to be, let them know what you need and the good seeds will rise to the top and pass the relationship test with flying colors, vow or no vow attached.

Check back for updates every Thursday: Diem will be chronicling her journey through fertility treatments, chemotherapy and her quest to educate others about ovarian health exclusively for PEOPLE.com. You can also follow her on Twitter @DiemBrown.

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Study: NYC better than LA at cutting kids' obesity


NEW YORK (AP) — A new study shows New York City is doing better than Los Angeles in the battle against childhood obesity, at least for low-income children.


From 2003 to 2011, obesity rates for poor children dropped in New York to around 16 percent. But they rose in Los Angeles and ended at about 20 percent.


The researchers focused on children ages 3 and 4 enrolled in a government program that provides food and other services to women and their young children.


The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention released the study Thursday.


The authors noted that the Los Angeles program has many more Mexican-American kids. Obesity is more common in Mexican-American boys than in white or black kids.


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Data, eBay earnings lift Wall Street to five-year high

NEW YORK (Reuters) - Wall Street rose on Thursday, with the S&P 500 climbing to a five-year intraday high, on improved housing and jobs data along with better-than-expected results from online marketplace eBay .


The data showed the number of Americans filing new claims for unemployment benefits fell to a five-year low last week, while groundbreaking for homes rose to the fastest pace in four years last month.


Strength in the housing and labor markets is key to sustained growth and higher corporate profits. Job market improvement helps stimulate consumer spending while a recovery in housing means more purchases of appliances, furniture and other household goods as well as a source of employment.


"The real estate numbers all look good, sales looked good, prices looked good, housing starts looked good," said Stephen Massocca, managing director at Wedbush Morgan in San Francisco.


"The only thing that still doesn't look really good in my mind are the employment numbers but even the claims were pretty good and inflation seems to be nonexistent so what's to stop the party from going?"


The Dow Jones industrial average <.dji> gained 82.97 points, or 0.61 percent, to 13,594.20. The Standard & Poor's 500 Index <.spx> advanced 8.31 points, or 0.56 percent, to 1,480.94. The Nasdaq Composite Index <.ixic> rose 17.12 points, or 0.55 percent, to 3,134.66.


PulteGroup Inc shares gained 4.9 percent to $20.29 and Toll Brothers Inc advanced 2.2 percent to $35.68. The PHLX housing sector index <.hgx> climbed 2.1 percent.


EBay's shares rose 3 percent to $54.47 a day after it reported holiday quarter results that just beat Wall Street expectations. It gave a 2013 forecast that was within analysts' estimates.


The S&P is on track for its third consecutive advance, which pushed the index above an intraday peak set in September to its highest since December 2007.


But gains were tempered by weakness in the financial sector, with Bank of America down 4.3 percent to $11.27 and Citigroup off 3 percent to $41.22 after they posted their results.


Bank of America's fourth-quarter profit fell as it took more charges to clean up mortgage-related problems. Citigroup posted $2.32 billion of charges for layoffs and lawsuits, while its new chief executive cautioned the bank needed more time to deal with its problems.


The S&P financial sector index <.spsy> slipped 0.14 percent as the only one of the 10 major S&P sectors to decline.


S&P 500 corporate earnings for the fourth quarter are expected to rise 2.3 percent, Thomson Reuters data showed. Expectations for the quarter have fallen considerably since October when a 9.9 percent gain was estimated.


With investors anticipating the current earnings season to be lackluster, their focus will be on the corporate earnings outlook for the months ahead, analysts said.


Shares of Boeing extended recent declines after the United States and other countries grounded the company's new 787 Dreamliner after a second incident involving battery failure. Boeing shed 0.4 percent to $74.05 and is down 1.5 percent for the week so far.


Market breadth was solid, with advancers outpacing decliners on the New York Stock Exchange 2,234 to 650, while on the Nasdaq the ratio was 1,602 to 762 in favor of advancing stocks.


(Reporting by Chuck Mikolajczak; Editing by Kenneth Barry and Nick Zieminski)



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